Certain people wonder,

“Why is she terribly sad?”

                                                

The true reason on why I am such a depressed person is  because of my family. You might laugh at me and thinking it is such a dumb thing to be sad of but I just cant – ugh whatever.

Lets take a walk down the horrible yet memorable memory lane, shall we? Well, things started when my parents drifted from each other. Fighting seems to be a casual late night activity and dad would destress by asking me to accompany him to watch WWE. I don't mind it really, because my dad is someone that I’m close to. We’d watch it and bet on oreos and it is wonderful actually, on how strong our bond is as daughter and father.

Weeks passes by without anyone noticing and out of the blue, my parents stated they’re gonna divorce. I didn't feel anything at the very moment because I, myself couldn't comprehend what ‘divorce’ is. All I know that it means dad won’t be staying with my sis, mom and I anymore. But I sort of thought he’d come back. I mean, he always does.

Mom moved to Penang the year I turned eleven, probably few months after her divorce and that was the year everything changed.  That was the year that the underdog is no longer me and the year after that kept getting better and better. People over there were friendly and nice and there, it didn't matter how rich you are or how smart you are, everyone will automatically be friends with you. And that’s the thing I personally love about Penang. Sure, there were few condescending bitches but most of them were lovely.

After four years of staying in Penang, mom decided to move back to the vintage Taiping. This happened after she married her co-worker for two solid years. I really didn't fancy the idea of going back to Taiping because it reminds me of dad and my friends are not something I’d rather lose. Each and every one of my friends are exotically beautiful in terms of personality and appearance and I just know I’m never gonna find anyone like them at Taiping. It upsets every single atom in me to even think about how everyone looked down on me and considered themselves queen at my old school. I don’t wanna get treated like that anymore. Do you even know how fucking depressing it is to get the vibe that you’re not good enough and you’ll never be? It’ll traumatize you .

To enhance the level of my misery, my dad passed away  on May 16th. Yeah, I lived few of  my years apart from him but at least I know he’s there and he’s always is. But knowing the fact that he’s gone, I feel so crushed. I feel so depressed in a way I've never have been. Its agony.

Some of you might take my feelings lightly but I have my own reasons for why I’m behaving the way I am and why I say the thing I've said.     

Certain people wonder,

“Why is she terribly sad?”

                                                

The true reason on why I am such a depressed person is  because of my family. You might laugh at me and thinking it is such a dumb thing to be sad of but I just cant – ugh whatever.

Lets take a walk down the horrible yet memorable memory lane, shall we? Well, things started when my parents drifted from each other. Fighting seems to be a casual late night activity and dad would destress by asking me to accompany him to watch WWE. I don't mind it really, because my dad is someone that I’m close to. We’d watch it and bet on oreos and it is wonderful actually, on how strong our bond is as daughter and father.

Weeks passes by without anyone noticing and out of the blue, my parents stated they’re gonna divorce. I didn't feel anything at the very moment because I, myself couldn't comprehend what ‘divorce’ is. All I know that it means dad won’t be staying with my sis, mom and I anymore. But I sort of thought he’d come back. I mean, he always does.

Mom moved to Penang the year I turned eleven, probably few months after her divorce and that was the year everything changed.  That was the year that the underdog is no longer me and the year after that kept getting better and better. People over there were friendly and nice and there, it didn't matter how rich you are or how smart you are, everyone will automatically be friends with you. And that’s the thing I personally love about Penang. Sure, there were few condescending bitches but most of them were lovely.

After four years of staying in Penang, mom decided to move back to the vintage Taiping. This happened after she married her co-worker for two solid years. I really didn't fancy the idea of going back to Taiping because it reminds me of dad and my friends are not something I’d rather lose. Each and every one of my friends are exotically beautiful in terms of personality and appearance and I just know I’m never gonna find anyone like them at Taiping. It upsets every single atom in me to even think about how everyone looked down on me and considered themselves queen at my old school. I don’t wanna get treated like that anymore. Do you even know how fucking depressing it is to get the vibe that you’re not good enough and you’ll never be? It’ll traumatize you .

To enhance the level of my misery, my dad passed away  on May 16th. Yeah, I lived few of  my years apart from him but at least I know he’s there and he’s always is. But knowing the fact that he’s gone, I feel so crushed. I feel so depressed in a way I've never have been. Its agony.

Some of you might take my feelings lightly but I have my own reasons for why I’m behaving the way I am and why I say the thing I've said.